The Inquiry
by oldmule
Summary: Post S9 and it's Harry's time to be questioned.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimers and all that. Characters are Kudos's and other names made up.**

**Have no idea where this might be going but felt the need to write something!**

There was a quiet corner of the Grid. Tariq sat by his monitor as the others gathered around. The enquiry had begun into the Albany case and the investigation into Harry Pearce along with it. There were many questions to be answered but all were behind closed doors in front of a select few, Section D were, most definitely not invited. The picture on the screen showed various members of the JIC, the DG and the Home Secretary but at it's centre and it's main focus was Harry himself, he sat facing them.

"Turn it up a bit, Tariq" said Dimitri.

"This is the best I can get, you want better, then next time you try getting a camera in there!"

"Sshhh," said Beth.

Only Ruth was quiet, focused on the screen.

"Thery're going to throw him to the wolves."

"Dimitri, shut up." Beth had had enough.

None of them were confident about what the results of the inquiry would be and in truth they were all unsure of their feelings about it. They had an incredible loyalty towards Harry but what he had done was wrong, very wrong. A genetic weapon in the hands of the Chinese and they'd let it go, well, Harry had let it go. They understood why but they couldn't truly forgive him for that. Especially Ruth. She felt it when they looked at her, felt them judging how she could be more important than thousands of lives. She bitterly felt the irony of it all, the irony of bad timing once more. She thought she had become hardened, had forgotten how to feel and then she was told that Harry was alive and it was Lucas who had fallen, in that moment she knew what it was to feel, she was overwhelmed with feeling. How, though, could she reconcile that with what he had done. How could she forgive him.

"So, Harry,'" the DG began, "perhaps you'd like to explain just why you deemed it necessary to give away a national secret to the Chinese?"

The team were hushed and though they didn't look at Ruth, she knew they were deeply aware that she was the answer to the question.

"I put the immediate interests of my officer first and gambled that I would be able to prevent Albany leaving the country once her safety was secured. I succeeded with one objective and sadly failed with the other."

"Sounds very simple" said the DG bitterly.

"It felt so at the time"

"Would you have taken the same action had it been any other officer?'

"I would like to think so."

"I bet you would" said Jason Graves, the head of 6, somewhat under his breath.

Harry ignored him.

The DG continued "Harry, are you in a relationship with Ruth Evershed?"

The team around the monitor tried hard not to look at Ruth and she tried hard to keep breathing.

"No". Harry's face was still and composed, it was true, sad and sorry and true.

"There have been rumours, rumours you've been sleeping together. Now's the time to tell us."

"No." said Harry, his composure slipping and his temper coming to the fore.

Graves was enjoying this, "Come on Harry, you gave away Albany for a cheap shag."

Harry's chair was flung back as he stood aggressively eyes tearing through Graves.

"Harry sit down." Said the DG firmly.

He sat, slowly trying to regain his composure but not losing the sense of fury he felt. They could assassinate his character but not Ruth's, they were not fit to speak her name. Slowly and deliberately he spoke, "I took a calculated risk and I lost. I put first the life of my most senior, most loyal, my best officer. I was not willing to let another member of my team die for a false secret, a fake."

This time all heads around Tariq's monitor did look away from the screen, they looked at each other.

"A Fake?" simply said Beth.

The DG continued, "Harry, it's a national secret, top security, it does not matter whether it works or not, the threat we have it is enough. Sorry, stupid me, the threat we _had _it, was enough."

"I was not prepared to have another life on my conscience for an empty threat that dated back to the cold war." Harry had regained his calm.

Ruth felt anything but calm. The team were smiling, their relief palpable, Harry was no traitor.

"Tariq, can you set off the fire alarm in their building?" Ruth asked.

"Course."

"Then do it."

"But, Ruth…?"

"Just do it" she said and walked towards the pods. "Dimitri, you're with me"

and the pod doors slid shut.


	2. Chapter 2

**Still kind of making it up as we go along, but anyway here's Chapter 2!**

"It wasn't just another life, though, was it Harry?" smirked Jason Graves.

"No, if you were listening to me, you would have heard me say it was the life of my most senior analyst, in fact the best analyst the service possesses."

"Your loyalty does you justice, I'm sure."

"Thank you" said Harry sardonically. He had always hated the man and this wasn't helping.

"But tell me, when one of your officers is injured do you always spend the night at the hospital with them?"

Harry looked up at Graves. "Occasionally."

"What even when their injuries are merely a few scratches and burns?"

Harry said nothing, his jaw was set and his eyes fixed.

"Drop the façade. You're incapable of a rational decision. You've been shagging Ruth on and off for years."

"Tariq, come on..." exclaimed Beth, she could see Harry's temper was rising.

"I'm nearly there. They've updated their systems….any second." He said attacking his keyboard.

"Ruth?"

"Just drive, Dimitri, I'll explain in a minute." She raised the phone. "Beth, what's happening?"

"We've had a problem but we're nearly there."

"Harry?" Ruth asked.

"Is getting angry" Beth answered.

"Tell Tariq, it has to be now."

Harry had had enough. He wouldn't listen to this anymore. He had saved Ruth and he would do it again a thousand times over, without hesitation under the same circumstances. If Albany had been real, would he have done it? No. He knew that. He knew that those circumstances would have been unbearable, but he could not have sacrificed Albany and the thousands, perhaps millions of lives with it. Fortunately he didn't have to face the consequences of that decision. He wasn't sure he could have lived with himself either way. Here and now though he knew that the committee would never believe that. What did he care if they wanted to hang him out to dry, did it all really matter anymore? Ruth clearly had no feelings for him, she'd forgiven him maybe but that was all. He felt rejected and tired, weary of the work and weary of his life. The one thing they couldn't and wouldn't do to him was to sully Ruth's reputation and to belittle his feelings for her. Yes, he loved her, yes he saved her and to hell with a national secret. To hell with all of them.

"Do not speak her name" Harry growled at Graves.

"Hit a nerve?' Asked the DG

Graves smiled "Not a good career choice to make your decisions with your dick, Harry."

The chair began to fly across the floor and Harry was only a couple of feet away from grabbing Graves by the throat when the fire alarm began its deafening howl.

"Done it!" said Tariq.

"Ruth, they're clearing the building." Beth watched the room Harry was in emptying.

"Did he say anything?"

"No, but I think he was about the kill the head of Six."

Dimitri pulled to a stop. "We're here, Ruth."


	3. Chapter 3

**3**

Dimitri crossed the courtyard. It was thronged with people whose ears were still ringing from the blaring alarm. He could see Harry standing slightly apart from the committee members in a far corner. Graves was not happy, he had been so close to having Harry Pearce exactly where he wanted him, even if that meant having Harry's hands round his own throat. Still, he was sure it wouldn't take too long to whip him back into another angry retort.

As Dimitri approached he caught Harry's eye, fortunately none of the others knew the new recruit and he felt safe not to be recognised by them. He walked close past Harry who had turned his back on him and as he did so Dimitri dropped the small piece of paper he was carrying. Harry's foot gently slid over it and a moment or two later he bent to tie his shoelace. 'Gents, first floor" was all it said. He stood and as he did so the alarm ceased. The courtyard began to empty and as Harry stepped off he scuffed the note through a storm grill with his foot and followed the committee back upstairs.

"You're not helping yourself, Harry," said the Home Secretary.

Harry said nothing.

"Trying to throttle the Head of Six maybe something we all feel like doing on occasions but I don't think it will help you keep your job."

Again Harry said nothing. He wasn't sure he wanted his job. He wasn't sure he had the heart to be betrayed again, to be rejected again. They were probably better off without him.

The HS looked at him, expecting an answer.

"Just need to…" Harry nodded towards the gents toilet.

"Right," replied the HS and followed the rest of the committee back into the inquiry room.

Harry walked in with a quick glance to make sure no one was following, they weren't. He walked slowly past the three cubicle doors, one was shut. He pushed it open.

"Hello, Harry."

"Ruth!" He didn't know what he had expected but it wasn't this.

"You can't kill Jason Graves, no matter what he says."

"So everyone keeps telling me!"

"Harry, listen. They want you to throw your career away, they want you to rise to the bait, to tell them that you made decisions based not on sense but from love."

"I did," he said simply.

"You can't tell them that. You have to convince them it was the right decision, or at least one you would have made for any one of us and you have to let them say whatever they want about me, however unpleasant it is."

"I can't."

"You can, Harry. Get through this and we'll be able to fix the rest."

"I don't know if I want to, Ruth."

His reticence annoyed her.

"You have to. The team need you, they're young, inexperienced, without you they're floundering. "

"And you?" he didn't know if he wanted to hear the answer but couldn't stop himself from the question.

"Yes, Harry, I need you too."

It was progress, he thought.

"Now, get in there and be Harry Pearce, diplomat"

"Not my best role, but I'll try."

"Try hard."

He turned for the door, hitting the button of the hand dried as he went. "And Ruth, the ladies is further down on the right."

She smiled for the first time and he saw it in the mirror as he left. 'Yes, it was progress' he thought.


	4. Chapter 4

**Short one cos I'm tired. **

**4**

Jason Graves was a dead man.

Not now, maybe not even in his lifetime but in Harry's eyes he had most definitely ceased to be.

"So, Harry, I hear your lovely analyst has made a reputation of banging her bosses."

Harry smiled.

"That's the rumour according to GCHQ," Graves grinned.

Harry smiled. Graves had the same sick grin on his face as he dangled by the neck in Harry's imagination.

"That may be the case, but I'm not one of them" he finally said very calmly, "but I'm sure I could introduce you, if you're interested."

The HS smiled.

Graves was not amused. "You love her, don't you Harry?"

Beth and Tariq held their breath, they didn't know what Ruth had said to Harry but it seemed to be making a difference. This, however, was a question they knew the answer to. Could he deny her, they wondered? Would he?

"I love her," repeated Harry thoughtfully "that's what you think, Jason? " He paused for effect. "No, that's not how I feel about Ruth."

Jason Graves wished they'd never had the break for the fire alert, it seemed like Harry Pearce had taken a bottle of valium.

'That's not how I feel about her at all' thought Harry, 'if you'd asked me if I was in love with her then you might have been a little closer to the truth, still you can't really ask me anything worthwhile because you're a dead man.'

Harry smiled.

**xxx**

It was 7pm when he opened his front door.

Without turning the lights on he crossed to the bottle of scotch by the window and poured a particularly generous measure. It had been a long and trying day. The third day in front of the Inquiry Committee. He wasn't sure what their findings would be but he knew that several members were feeling the pressure, the pressure of blackmail, the pressure of knowing where and when their skeletons were hidden. Harry knew a lot of skeletons. He had some hope.

"Hello, Harry"

He nearly dropped his glass as he span round.

"Ruth, I'm beginning to think you have a problem with just coming in, like normal people."

"Close the curtains, Harry."

He did as he was told, knowing that there may well be surveillance on his house.

"Would it be stupid of me to ask if anyone may have seen you breaking in here?'

"Yes, very stupid." She said.

"Ok, I won't ask then."

He turned a small side light on and looked at her sat in his chair.

"I never asked you how you knew what was going on at the Inquiry?"

"Argh," she said, "that would be Tariq."

"Argh" she need say no more.

"So, Ruth, are you here to use the bathroom, or is it a social call?" He said straightfaced, hoping he could raise a smile on that oh so serious face.

"Social, I should say." No smile. "I wanted to thank you, Harry. Thank you for coming for me. Thank you for…for.." she trailed off.

There was a silence and neither dared to finish the sentence.

**Prob more to come anon**.


	5. Chapter 5

**OK, couldn't sleep so here's the last of the night.**

**5**

"Talk to me, Ruth."

She hesitated.

"You told Graves that you didn't love me."

"You told me to."

"I know."

"But…you sounded like you meant it, Harry."

"I think you'll find that's the idea of a lie."

She was quiet and did not meet his eye.

"Actually, Ruth, to tell the truth it wasn't actually a lie."

Now he had her attention.

"Oh." Was all she could manage.

"I don't love you."

She nodded seriously and stood up, not meeting his gaze.

"Are you going somewhere, Ruth?"

"I think it's time I got back to feed the cats"

"Yes, very important, not something to be ignored." He wanted to bait her, he wanted a response. She started to put on her coat.

"Is that not what you expected to hear, Ruth?"

"No, maybe. I can't unpick it all" she sounded lost.

"Must everything be broken down and analysed?'

"Yes, Harry that's who I am."

He began to see things a little more clearly.

He stepped to her, not daring to touch her, he never dared to touch her, even when she left him on the quay she was the one who had held him. All he had ever risked was a friendly pat on the shoulder and a hand that hovered around the small of her back. He had never trusted himself. Self denial. Self control.

He leant close to her, so close she could feel his breath on her cheek, he whispered in her ear but he didn't touch her.

"How do you feel now, Ruth?"

"I…I don't know"

"Tell me. Try."

"Hot. I feel hot."

"Well, the reasons for that may be that you've just put your coat on, or my central heating is too high, or I'm standing a little too close to you. Any reason in particular?"

"A combination, possibly, but most probably the latter."

"And if I tell you that I don't love you? How do you feel?"

"Harry, please stop."

"I don't love you, Ruth. I did, but now it's different."

"I need to go" she made to turn.

"No." he said and the command in his voice made her stay even against her will.

He kept his mouth close to her ear.

"I don't love you.."

"I know, you don't need to keep telling me," she was struggling, she was trapped.

"Do you want me to stop?"

"Yes, please stop."

"Why?"

"Because…."

"Why, Ruth?"

"Because I thought you did love me."

"Why?"

"Because you saved me, because you asked me to marry you, because you look at me the way you do, because you were angry when I said no."

"And now I tell you that I don't"

"Yes."

"So your analysis is wrong."

"Yes!"

"So how does that make you feel? Are you angry you're wrong, or angry that I don't love you?"

"Both. Both. Please let me go now."

"I don't love you"

"Harry, please"

"I don't love you"

She wanted to run, she wanted to cry, she wanted him to leave her alone, to stop torturing her.

"I'm _in love_ with you, Ruth."

He moved now and for the first time since he had stood up he looked her fully in the face.

"I'm _so much_ in love with you, I can't breathe."

He gazed on her.

"How do you feel now, Ruth?"

"Happy" she said without thinking.

He smiled a warm velvety smile, "Unpick that," he said.

She smiled a warm, familiar but long missed smile, "I don't need to.".

"Why?"

"Because I love you, Harry"

"Are you sure? Sure it's not some irrational, lazy analysis, that you'll reassess later?' He was teasing her now.

"Analyse this," she said softly and kissed him like she would never see him again.

He reached out and let himself touch her, let every part of him feel her against him. She lost herself in the wonder of feeling, confused as to quite why it had taken her so long to come to such an obvious conclusion.

**The end or an Epilogue may follow. Who knows. Hope you enjoyed.**


	6. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

"Harry."

"Yes, Ruth"

"Have I told you that I love you?'

"Yes, Ruth, that's about the fifth time today"

"I wasn't actually telling you, that was just a question"

"Right, in that case you've told me four times today"

"Good, well, I'm just nipping to the loo, won't be a sec."

"Ruth?"

"Yes, Harry"

"I love you too. And by the way the ladies is the on the left, just in case you get confused."

She beamed at him and walked away. Harry was content, no, more than content, significantly more than content.

This was the first time they had been out together for three months, choosing wisely to keep their relationship strictly eyes only. He had picked the very quiet, uassuming restaurant and it had been a good choice, they had felt comfortable and safe.

"Hello, Harry"

Safe until now.

"Fancy seeing you here."

The door from the toilets opened and Ruth crossed to him, still fighting with her handbag zip.

"And Ruth, too. How cosy."

Ruth looked up and froze. He was as odious in the flesh. Jason Graves.

Harry said nothing but nodded for Ruth to sit back down.

"Well, this is interesting."

"As interesting as it may be, if you'd excuse us we have dessert to come." Ruth was surprised by Harry's civility.

"Lying to the committee, Harry? Well, well. And Miss Evershed living up to the reputation I see."

Harry's jaw was set. Ruth's attention was still with him, as her head spiralled off to the trouble Graves could still cause for them.

"I'll leave you to your dessert then. I'm sure I'll be seeing you soon, Harry, very soon."

The threat was implicit as he crossed the room to a table towards the back of the restaurant, he was still smiling.

"Harry, can we go?" She wanted the safety of his house.

He nodded and stood, disdain and anger burning in his eyes. As she put on her coat he turned to the back of the room.

"Harry, don't" It was too late. She watched hoping he was not going to do anything foolish, she knew how much he hated the Head of Six.

The odious smile slipped from Graves' lips and he dropped back into his chair, he looked decidedly unwell. Harry returned, reached his arm around her and led her from the restaurant.

"Harry, what just happened?"

"His skeleton's not buried quite as deep as he thought and I know precisely where and what it is."

He smiled and kissed her.

"Have I told that I love you, Harry."

"Mmm, five times today."

She smiled.

"But Ruth, I still don't believe it, you're going to have to show me."

"I believe I've shown you, twice already today Harry."

"Three's a nice number, though, don't you find?"

"Yes Harry, three's a very nice number."


End file.
